Hot Beans - Season 1 - Episode 6

Episode 6 years ago

Hot Beans - Season 1 - Episode 6

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We arrived there a little bit late as a result of the delay I caused the rest campers.

The first person that welcomed me was my little kid sister Elizabeth, she rushed down to the park when she heard that our bus just arrived.


Seeing my mood and the way others who boarded the same bus with me looked, she knew all was not well.

She tried to know the secret behind my state of depression, but I didn’t unveil it to her immediately as I wasn’t in the mood for such.

The first thing I did was to lodge in the quarters meant for male before meeting up with my Sister again.
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She complained of being hungry and insisted on eating from any restaurant around, before the church catering service will provide meal for all campers.

With the experience I had from Mama Yabasikiri restaurant, I declined her suggestions and made her know that if not eatery like sizzlers, Mr. Biggs, Fantazia etc then I won’t allow her to eat anywhere else.

She tried to know why I stopped her from eating in the canteens around, but i didn’t educe any explanation at that moment.

We later saw a small store where I bought a 50cl of Pepsi, and eggroll for her.

While she was eating, I narrated all that I passed through while coming to the camp.

Elizabeth was so ashamed of the situation and felt pity on me.

She knew I will be mocked by those who I came with, and planned on how she will rundown anyone that tried to make jest of me because of all that happened.

Elizabeth being helpful, also assured me that I will get the pretty girl I have been yelling for.

Immediately she finished with her light meal, we went back to the camp where we partook in all the activities for that day.
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DAY2 OF THE CAMP

The next day of the camp (Saturday) was scheduled for Bible quiz.

Those that normally represents our branch didn’t come with us this year. ☆☆

I have disgraced myself by shiiting (stooling) on my body.

The fat girl was the first person to jump up from the seat and struggled to climb the next seat. Her size couldn’t make her secure a place in the next seat as those there pushed her from their body.

The bus became rowdy, some people who don’t know what was happening shouted at the driver to stop the bus, which made him matched an automatic break.

Everyone started fighting with the door, struggling to come out from the bus. The driver taught it was only the fart he never knew it’s more critical;


DRIVER: Na who mess sawa (sour) mess for this bus?


PRETTY GIRL: Gossshhh! Its more than fart

FAT GIRL: Na shiit and mess combined together oo, the thing dey kill me here


STUDENT PASTOR: Driver I can’t open this door please help
(Talking with his nose closed)


ANOTHER CAMPER: Oga please come and open your door ooooooo

The driver was still behaving reluctantly, that it was the camp leader who was sitting at the front with the driver, that came to their rescue.

He rushed to the door and opened it at once.
The campers were jumping and climbing each others, especially those who could not alight from the bus quickly.

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At this point I was just shaking my head in disbelief. How on earth will I wash this shame of myself.

Imagine the shame and disgrace Mama Yabasikira has put me. Soon everyone evacuated the bus leaving me alone inside.

I quietly removed my trouser, bent down on one of the seats where I toilet comfortably until I was satisfy, it was smelling just like the beans I ate.

I collected another trouser from my bag and put it on after cleaning my anus with the first one I wore.

All the campers including the camp leader and the driver were complaining outside that I should come out, but I didn’t answered them until I was done.
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After I finished cleaning the shiit (poop) that stained the seat, I walked out shamefully;


DRIVER: Na true say you shiit for inside?


ME: **looked at him and send my face back to the direction I have decided to throw away the clothes I used in cleaning the excreata**


FAT GIRL: Driver you be doubting Thomas? Go and see for yourself na, or can’t you perceive the smell from his body?
(Blabbing as if she was the only one in the bus)


PASTOR: May the good Lord be with you


DRIVER: Good Lord ke! Better go and look for soap and water to wash it oo
I gave them deaf ears, walked to the bush part off the tar road, and throw away the clothes.

To avoid further embarrassment, I went to a nearby store where I bought klin soap.

Thank God the car stopped closed to a small community, I explained everything to the lady who sold the soap to me, and she instruct her son to carry a bucket of water along with me.

I got to where the bus was, and with the assistance from the small boy, I was able to wash the vehicle…

After washing it, I gave the small boy N500 for his support which he refused to collect and ran down home.

Everyone entered the car in turn, and I could see the kind of pity look I got from my intended to be church girlfriend.

Immediately everyone got in, we continued our journey and I could not say a word as other campers especially the fat lady beside me, makes jest of me.

She even did the worst by bringing out her aboki perfume and spray all around me and the seat. She deliberately borrowed it to each roll of seat for them to spray it round so the bad odour won’t dominate…

We finally got to our destination, and I was the laughing stock in the camp
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Myself and the fair pretty girl were the ones chosen to represent our school branch, in this years edition.

I wasn’t really prepared for the Bible quiz, but since I was chosen by our camp leader I had no other choice, than to accept.

Our names were submitted on her behalf by the camp leader. And it was as a result of the quiz, that I knew her name to be Anita….

We did well in the bible quiz as we counter all the questions co-operatively, but at the end we weren’t able to clinch the first prize.

We took second with an overall grand point of 145, while Lagos branch who hosted this years youth camp took first with a total point of 155.
The difference wasn’t that much, and this made us to be more happy with the intention of doing better the next year. And as a result of this Anita became more friendly to me.

Those who were mocking me due to what happened on the bus, became friendly to me also. The secret behind it is because our branch has never excelled that far in any competitive game @ our camping history.

— — — —
Ya, I was really immersed in shame but my extra-ordinary performance throughout the camp brought back honour to me, especially that of the quiz.

My younger sister (Elizabeth) on my behalf talked to Anita, and behold I never knew she accepted me.

We both came across each other severally, but I never gave her time nor talk to her.

Even the fat bread buns came to congratulate me, but I gave her fake smile and stylishly left her presence…

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After the Sunday activities, we all prepared our belongings so we can leave early Monday morning…

It was fun moment all around me in the camp, but whenever I am happy, Mama Yabasikira always come into my mind. If only I could approach her and give her the insult of a life time…


MONDAY MORNING

We left the camp yard in Lagos as early as 5am.
It was just as if myself and Anita were meant to be, we both sat in same seat but my greatest happiness was that the bread buns of a woman didn’t sit close to us…

Anita started a conversation with me, and told me she noticed I liked her and she felt same for me.

In the course of our discussion, I observed my Elizabeth was the secret behind her acceptance.

Anita didn’t stopped there, she cross-examined me by asking what made me excrete on the bus, and I explained it all to her.

She was really sorry for all I went through during our Journey to camp and adviced I stay-off roadside meals next time am travelling…

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We finally got to our destination, and she pleaded I shouldn’t go to Mama Yabasikira to complain or pickup a fight.


QUESTION: What kind of complain do I even have to lay? and if I should complain is there any offence I can hold her with?

Well, ever since this disgraceful event, I vowed never to taste beans not even the one cooked by me….
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Thanks for reading Hot Beans….
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THE END