I have been in a l£sb!an relationship for five years but I’m having great s*x with a man on the side. It’s made me feel very confused. My partner is 25 and I’m 21.

I do love her but the passion has totally gone. We met when I was only 16 and I soon fell in love. It was my first sexual relationship. We moved into a flat. I was happy at first but things began to go flat after a few months.

After we had been together for a couple of years I met a cute guy at a party and we started a secret affair.

He wanted me all to himself but I was too frightened to leave what I had back at home so he finished with me. I missed him like crazy but I tried to forget about him and get on with my life. However, three months ago he came back in my life.

He is 23 now. He said he still loves me and thinks about me every day. I was so happy to see him again and we quickly got back to our old sexy ways. We’re now meeting up to have s*x every chance that we can. I want to be with him so badly but my partner is still my best friend.

I do truly care about her even though the spark between us is gone. Now the big problem is that my partner and I plan to go travelling in June.

It’s all booked and paid for and the trip is going to last a whole year. I can’t think of anyone else I would rather go travelling with. But I can’t bear to leave my male lover behind. I don’t want to lose my best friend and I don’t want to miss out on the trip.

What do I do?

I feel so confused about my sexuality and can’t decide what I should do.