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Deric: Hello sweetheart, what are you doing?
Charlotte: ermmm, my husband paid for this weekend away in this beautiful resort. So I am just in this swimming pool enjoying myself with this bottle of champagne!
Deric: come on, babe! You can answer my question without being cocky.
Charlotte: Deric, I am aware that you lost your job, but when did you lose your sight? I mean, what was the meaning of that question! You clearly saw me cleaning!
Deric: I did. But I was only trying to start a conversation since you didn’t even take any notice of my presence. Anyway! How was work?
Charlotte: stressful!
Deric: have you had something to eat then?
Charlotte: no. Because you left everywhere a mess, and I can’t function in this filth
Deric: erm, I’m very sorry, I..I woke up late and didn’t have the time to clean up
Charlotte: were you running late for work?
Deric: I was running late for an appointment, Charlotte!
Charlotte: oh great! So how was the appointment?
Deric: I met the manager and after a brief conversation, we realised I am not what they are looking for.
Charlotte: so cleaning the house wouldn’t have been such a bad idea. Would it.
Deric: can you just stop going on and on about one day I failed to clean the house!
Charlotte: I see. Anyway, you have a letter.
Deric: from who?
Charlotte: find out. It’s right there on the shelf.
Deric: (sluggishly opens the letter, had a glance, dropped it and started undressing)
Charlotte: that letter is not one to be flipped or left in the shelf. It requires action and I am not one bit ready to deal with that rude woman. Rent is due, my dear husband!
Deric: Charlotte, Please give me a break. Will You?
Charlotte: just passing a message.
Deric: message received. Thank You!
Charlotte: It’s a pleasure!
Deric: Charlotte?
Charlotte: what?
Deric: who is Jaykob?
Charlotte: Bobrisky’s gate man!
Deric: oh will you cut that crap and answer my question!!
Charlotte: hey! You are shouting!
Deric: I’m shouting because you are acting daft! Who is jaykob that kept texting you all night!
Charlotte: I don’t know what you are talking about!
Deric: Charlotte, you attended one of the best universities in the UK, so stop acting as if you have no understanding of the English language!
Charlotte: na asu oyibo (keep speaking English)
Deric: and don’t answer me in your language because you know so d--n well that I do not understand It!!!
Charlotte: well! Maybe the time you spent perusing my phone should have been invested in learning a word or two of your wife’s native language! (Storms out)